Gone Speechless

As I mentioned in my last post, I've been sick for a few days now. I'm a lot better at this point, but still recovering. For me it's just allergies-- people cutting their grass again, people outside smoking all over campus (well, even in the elevators). Spring.  At the peak of my sickness, I actually lost my voice.

I've only had this happen a few times in my life, and it's never been full blown laryngitis or anything.  As far as I can remember, it's never really lasted throughout a full day.  But, Tuesday, my voice was shot.  At first I was kind of entertained by it. It was funny. I sounded ridiculous trying to bark out my raspy sentences. But it became a lot less funny throughout the day.

I'm a quiet person. I don't spend a lot of time talking. I generally stay shut up unless something is really eating away at me. Honestly, most of the time when I'm speaking it's complaints. Anyone would agree. And I know how annoying that can be, so it's probably better that I'm not talkative.  Since I'm both introverted and shy, I don't feel the need to be chatting all day. I can't be bothered with it. Some people don't like that, but that's another post altogether.

However, with my voice gone, I had become so frustrated with not being able to say anything I wanted to say. I couldn't sing in choir rehearsal. I couldn't even carry a simple conversation because it took too much effort to strain my voice, and I hate to repeat myself. Sitting at dinner with some friends, it was almost painful not being able to talk. Every time I had something to add to the conversation, a sad puppy dog face was all I could contribute. When I went up for grilled cheese in the cafe, the worker asked if I'd like one or two slices.  They never ask that!  But of course the day I can't speak up, they do. I stood there awkwardly throwing up a peace sign for 2 slices, annoyed by this mime's life.

For me, talking isn't a big deal. I spend more time silent than I do talking, and I've never had a problem with it until the ability was taken away from me. My voice is back now and still kind of raspy, but at least it's something. It's back to that "listen to how funny I sound" stage. But I'm happy to have my funny sounding voice back just in time for our choir concert this Saturday.