Quarter Life Crisis

Beginning a blog is weird. A lot of these posts are just serving as introductions/background information on where I come from. Plus, I'm not even sure who I am writing to.

I just turned 20 last month. I was excited about it as my birthday was coming up. I don't know why 20 isn't a bigger deal. I understand 18 and 21, I guess. I never understood the appeal of the 16th birthday, just because I had (and still have) no desire to drive.  But 20 seems pretty significant to me.

I wanted to do something to commemorate the big 2-0. I "planned" for months ahead of time, but came up with nothing. Last year, for my 19th, I had my hair cut short for a change. It wasn't much of a change since I've worn short hair before, but no one at college had seen it. Since then, I've regretted cutting my hair numerous times. I decided I couldn't let myself make any hasty decisions like that again this year. So there goes the triple tongue piercing I was considering.

I ended up not doing anything too special for my birthday, and it was fine. Except for the meltdown I had about entering my 20s! No one seems to believe me, but the Quarter Life Crisis is a REAL thing. Like a midlife crisis, the quarter life crisis is an experience emerging adults have around their early 20s. It just happened to smack me in the face the week of my 20th.

I don't remember the exact occurrences that led up to this feeling I was having. I know I had a busy week with presentations and papers due for school that was causing me to stress. I was behind in getting my summer plans together and wasn't sure how that was going to work out with the end of the semester approaching. I had classes to schedule for fall semester coming up and no idea what I was going to take or how much I had left to do in school. I felt like I was going nowhere and never going to be able to accomplish my goals in life. I felt really behind in general compared to where I thought I should be at 20. I was nearly a mess, but I found a way to joke about all these feelings and pulled through.

A month later, I know how silly I was being about my "quarter life crisis." I still believe it's a real thing. Something about no longer being a teen is kind of scary. It's something I have always been excited about because I didn't love being a teenager, especially the early years. I hated middle and high school. I'm glad to be past that stage and I have absolutely no desire to go back. But at the same time, not knowing exactly what's ahead of me as I enter adulthood is what makes me nervous. I'm no longer in crisis mode, at least for now. I'm enjoying where I am now. I really like the progressions of life. No matter where I end up down the road, I know I'm taken care of. No worries.